Sweetheart's gotta run.

Knee deep in chaos. That's all I've got to describe life lately. Good chaos, but chaos none the less. I'm sure you've noticed from the dwindling blog posts and complete lack of commenting on everyone elses blogs, but to say I've been busy would be a complete understatement. I wanted to thank you all for the suggestions regarding my butt in the last post, haha. In case you were wondering, I chose the tutu.

It's amazing how quickly life passes when you are busy for what feels like every second of the day. And I see the escape of time reflected the most in my children. No truer words have ever been spoken than "they grow up too fast". In the blink of an eye, my sweet little toddler Rowen has turned into an opinionated preschooler who refers to his mother as sweetheart. As in "Hey sweetheart, can you get me some more ketchup?" (true story, I kept waiting for him to ask me to go ahead and top off his coffee while I'm at it). My innocent little newborn Kain is now a toddler who runs around the house yelling "I'M MAD!!" instead of crying when he is upset, and giggling with pure glee as he mocks his older brothers every move.

I know I won't be in school forever, but I feel like at this rate I'm going to come home from class and one of them is going to ask for the car keys and a $20 spot. And so this week, I made an effort to spend as much extra time as I could with Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy (I've been informed by the 3 year old that from now on this is what my pair of offspring shall be referred to as. You know, just as an FYI.) and therefore blog land was put on the backburner. Sorry friends, I'm sure you understand!

But through the homework, papers, exams, work, ear infected non sleeping babies and truck stop talking toddlers, I've been training. One of the things that I love about running is that it's ALWAYS there for you. The only question that ever needs to be asked is will you step up and meet it? So it's cold. Raining. Early/late. You didn't sleep because amoxocillin acts like a shot of espresso for your toddler. You may not feel like running, and that's fine. But if you change your mind, it will be right there, waiting to challenge you. If there's a will, there's a way, as so many of you and your Yak Trax & determination have proven this winter.

Tuesday, after 25 minutes of zone 2, I was unleashed to run 25 minutes in a high z3 & z4. I couldn't stay in z4 and get to my 5k pace, but I was able to run low 8:00's staying in my HR zone. And let me tell you, it felt SO GOOD. My legs were burning, my lungs were getting there, yet it all seemed almost effortless, in a twisted, awesome sort of way. It had been a while since I had gotten a chance to run hard, and I relished every second of it. Wednesdays recovery "easy" run was harder than the hard run. I even tried it twice, and twice threw my arms up in defeat after 30 minutes. But I tried, and felt so much better that evening because of it.

This morning, I met up with 3 lovely ladies from dailymile for a group run. Coach wanted me to run a zone 2, conversational pace. Weeellll my heart rate had different ideas, but I assure you I was conversational. My mouth runs as much as my feet do some days. We talked about a whole slew of things, from kids to running (no surprises there!) but the consensus of the running talk today was that we all never imagined we'd end up where we were now: in love with running. And as I came upon the last mile in an easy, wonderful 9 mile run, I remembered the days when 1 mile was a huge struggle. Those days when I dreaded lacing up my shoes because I knew the pain and struggle that lay ahead of me.

I've come so far.

I've been accused a lot lately of being addicted to running (by non runners of course). Well if I'm addicted to running, then I'm addicted to air. Because I need to breathe, and I need to run. In my eyes it's not an addiction, it's a necessity. Good runs, bad runs, fast runs, slow runs, fun runs, competitive runs, and everything in between. Running is my zen, the keel in my boat. I don't expect everyone to understand that, though I have a feeling most of you do. Running isn't just an addition to the chaos, running is what helps me conquer the chaos.

And so in the chaos that is my life, I am thankful for so many things. I am sure to count my blessings every single day and night. But no matter how long the list, I never forget to thank these crazy legs and feet for the amazing journey they continue to take me on. Without them, I wouldn't be the same person I am today, there is no doubt in my mind about that.

Sorry to get all Nicholas Sparks sentimental mushy on you folks today, haha. Happy running friends, enjoy your journey!